Tuesday, January 20, 2009

In all brilliant, stupid honesty

Where are you?
--

Meet me in outerspace.
I will hold you close if you're afraid of heights.

--

As Meredith so eloquently put it, "I am not all rainbows. I am a cloudy person who feels sorry for serial killers." I wish I could pretend that I was all smiles. I wish I could pretend that I don't have bad days where I feel myself breaking over and over again. I wish I was content being patient with where I am. I still think about all of my dead friends. I still am getting over the betrayals I have been dealt. I am still trying to find forgiveness in my heart for my stepmother. My migraines are a result of post-traumatic stress. I am still trying to reconcile my parents' divorce with who I am today. One thing that I do have is undying hope, and a drive to always fight for something better.

I wish I could've told you. I'm sorry I was not perfect for you.

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