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It was you and me against the world
And you promised me forever and more
Was it something that I said?
Was it something that I did?
Cuz I gotta know what made me unbeautiful.

I had a dream about you last night. It would have been six years soon. Sometimes I feel like I lost my best friend; things can never be the same. Usually it doesn't bother me; usually I'm over it. Something about the Christmas season always reminds me of you and I don't know why. At least this year I won't have to cry over not seeing you... for the fifth time. I am happy to be seeing you without attachment. I am glad the hurt is over, but sometimes I still wonder what really happened. This trend has become poison in my veins.

I have been trying to think of a good New Years resolution: I will stop blaming myself for things that weren't my fault, and I will start living again.

I also should stop biting my nails. I hate that it's my unconscious de-stressor.