I still measure my life in love.

Have you ever just known something... all your life?

Someone reminded me today that life is for the taking, and that they know I will take it and do great things.

Well. Onward and upward.
--
Share love,
Give love,
Spread love,
Measure your life in love.

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Neverending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise

--

Help me to understand Your plan for me.

Where You will lead me, I will follow.

I still want to believe in love.

Take Me As I Am, Lord

This is still the deepest desire of my heart. I ask for it every day.
--
You are the open door to freedom

You are the only hope I have

The reason in my reasons

The only thing that lasts

How could I begin to settle

When all within me longs

To step into the shelter of Your everlasting arms?

I wanna get carried away

I wanna get tossed by Your waves

I don't care where or how deep

I'm gonna jump in with both feet

I wanna get carried away

I wanna lost in Your ways

I wanna be held by Your Truth

I wanna behold all of You

I'm gonna be all Yours today,

I wanna get carried away.

The Leaves are Turning

It's almost October already... how did that happen?

Sometimes it's hard to work at Messiah because I have to walk through all of my memories over and over again. Sometimes it's saddening - a geographical reminder of the things that have since passed me by and left me. Retracing my footsteps makes me feel empty that things are not the same anymore.

What I wouldn't give to start over with the knowledge I have now. I suppose the only thing to do at this point is learn from my mistakes and try not to make them again.

Oh, won't you light my candle?

The songs have new meanings
But my voice still sounds beautiful singing them.
That hasn't changed.

--

I can listen to Rent and Across the Universe again. Finally. It feels wonderful :)

Rent is one of my fondest memories. Thank you.

Today was a beautiful day... Carly and I made a huge pot of coffee with nutmeg and cinnamon and watched TV and I painted all day long <3 And then we chilled at Barnes and Noble in the evening with DJ :)

--

Without you, the eyes gaze,
the legs walk, the lungs breathe.

Walk Me Down Your Broken Line

Late night, listing.

1. You give and You take away... and You've always taught me to understand that.
2. I miss Italy so much...
3. I have been craving sushi but no one else likes it.
4. I am so glad I have tomorrow off!
5. I want to watch the first Harry Potter... I've been wanting to all week.
6. TGIF and the girls and I are going out <3
7. I hope my letter comes soon.
8. Why did I have to find those postcards?
9. I still miss Italy. I wish it was May so I could go there. Everything there has such a personal history to it - such a breath of wisdom and age to it. Everything is deep in Italy.
10. I want to be productive tomorrow and that means going to bed...

Goodnight.

Pray for me?

A Collection of Various Thoughts

I am realizing more and more that I am tied to nothing. I can go wherever I want to. Where will I go? What do I want to do? This answer is mine alone and I can already feel my ambition tugging on my sleeve.

Wow.

Where shall I go? Here am I. Send me.

--

My passion is something no one will ever take away from me. You can break me, but you can never take my talents away from me. They will always be with me, making me who I am. I will always be able to find comfort, strength, and satisfaction in them.

--
My faith gets me through every part of every day.

In this time of fear
When prayer so often proved in vain
Hope seemed like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away
And now I am standing here
With heart so full I can't explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I'd say

There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe

Ashira l'adonai ki gaoh ga-ah
Ashira l'adonai ki gaoh ga-ah
Mi chamocha baelim adonai
Mi kamocha nedar bakodesh

Nachita v'chas-d'cha am zu ga-alta
Nachita v'chas-d'cha am zu ga-alta
Ashira ashira ashira

--
The most interesting thing in life is to find yourself in a similar place that you were in before and reflect back on it. I have my moments of doubt and agony, but also of empowerment and determination. Going back and reading through my Livejournal with what happened with Andrew (today is the day) is actually comforting because I know that I have gone through these things before and I still came out having learned a ton about myself, having a stronger, closer walk with Christ, and having found happiness, even if it was fleeting. I know (or at least hope) that my happiness won't always be short-lived.

Last year I wrote,

"This woman knows how to take the broken pieces of her heart and transform them. This woman is confident, strong, beautiful, and intelligent. And when she looks at herself in the mirror, like she said so many months ago, she sees someone worthwhile, loved by God, and loved by her friends and family. And no one can take that away from her."

And it's still true.

That's What You Get.

I'm going out. So I'm rocking out. Listening to this.
--
I can't decide
You have made it harder just to go on
And why?
All the possibilities...
Well I was wrong

That's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa!
That's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa...
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating.
And that's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa.

I wonder, how am I supposed to feel when you're not here.
'Cause I burned every bridge I ever built when you were here.
I still try... holding onto silly things, I never learn.
Oh why? All the possibilities. I'm sure you've heard.

That's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa!
That's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa..
I drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating.
And that's what you get when you let your heart win. Whoa.

Pain, make your way to me, to me
And I'll always be just so inviting.
If I ever start to think straight.
This heart will start a riot in me.

In the Arms of Your Mercy I Find Rest

I find that every time I go searching for You, I find You. Every time I look for You, You are there waiting for me. Your words are always the same: "I will never leave you, no matter what happens". You have never let me down.

This verse has been at the front of my thoughts:

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.

And when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.

And when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned."

Isaiah 43:2

Esperar

You aren't in the places I remember you.

The breeze felt good on my arms today. I wish I had more time to take a walk and think and talk to God. I wish it was raining so I could walk in it. There was an electricity in the air today, a living thing, a presence that rippled through my work clothes. I felt so serene and quiet. I felt like my eyes could see a million things at once and take it all in. God's colours were brighter today; perhaps because He knew I was stopping to notice.

The world was beautiful today.

Women are like a family.

Sketch time - Finally got time for art :)

Why isn't this working?

Still the most incredible thing I've seen.

I want adventure in the great, wide somewhere
I want it more than I can tell.
And for once, it might be grand
To have someone understand
I want so much more than they've got planned...

Everyone should listen to "Shadowfeet" by Brooke Fraser.

Still still still

I usually only post a portion of song lyrics. This deserves them all.

I picked up an email address today for a church in Mechanicsburg that is looking for worship leaders/musicians/singers. I will be looking into it. Today God has reminded me of why He gave me a big heart; it is to be filled with the big heart of another.

You should know that you're not alone.

-- "High and Lifted Up" by Hillsong
Lord of all the earth
And all of heaven
I come and seek Your face
Worship You with all I have within me
Humbled by Your grace

Every heart, every nation
Every tribe, all creation
Will bow before Your presence and sing

You are high and lifted up
You are high and lifted up
And my soul sings hallelujah
To the Lamb
The Lamb of God

Lord of righteousness
You come in glory
Bright and morning star
All my days I'll worship and adore You
Healer of my heart

Every prayer, every cry
You alone satisfy
We will lift Your praise
Again and again

You are high and lifted up
You are high and lifted up
And my soul sings hallelujah
To the Lamb
The Lamb of God

Please let me stay and rest in Your holiness

I realize that this is not the best venue for some of my feelings and will therefore not be writing them here anymore.

--

Today was good. We had the Opportunities Fair at Messiah, which proved to be entirely too interesting and informative for a number of reasons. I feel so blessed to be surrounded by a community of believers that really support me. I have asked God to just walk with me these past few days, and I have truly felt Him there. I am reminded of how He is in control, and I feel comfort in it. I think He is trying to remind me that the only thing I need is Him. This summer I have felt closer to God than I have in a long time... I feel myself growing in understanding, and I never cease to be amazed at the wisdom and insight others have. There are times when I have taken fellowship for granted; what a wonderful thing that God designed :) Sometimes I have to laugh at how God reminds me that my insecurities are only things that I have the power to change. He did it so creatively today. So unexpected.

I can't wait for Girls' Night tomorrow night. I love my friends like crazy and I am so blessed to have them. :)